Business jargon is not new; neither are articles on it. But Covid-19 has augmented every professional’s game. Doctors are treating more patients, economists are suggesting larger structural reforms, politicians are holding more meetings and executives are indulging in greater corporate guff. So the pandemic’s boost to business gobbledygook is worth exploring.
Here’s what BCG, a consultancy, posted on its website two years ago, soon after Covid-19 was upon us: “Immediate action is critical, but leaders must also embrace a new agenda — one aimed squarely at what comes next, for business and all of society”. I was flummoxed when I read it for the first time… and the second. On the third reading the meaning finally seeped through: BCG was urging us to do stuff we have to do now and then do stuff that we have to do next. Not to be outdone, its rival EY-Parthenon raised the level of twaddle, saying, “through the crisis, long-term value is going to become a much brighter ‘North Star’ by which to navigate.”
As the pandemic has spread, so has business parlance to deal with it. Two years into Covid-19, BCG continues to offer such pearls of wisdom (on its landing page, no less): “Always-on business transformation is essential for surviving disruption.”
Perhaps the most important lesson emerging from this tragic pandemic is the need for transformation, especially digital transformation. Google Trends shows the use of the phrase, already on a steady rise since 2015, has doubled in the last three years. When we hear a CEO say, “We need urgent digital transformation to prepare for the post-Covid world”, we are not sure whether they want employees to encourage customers to shop online, reply to inter-department emails faster or keep the camera on during Zoom meetings. Perhaps they’re not sure, either.
In my experience, managers use complex jargon for three reasons: to sound grand, obfuscate ignorance, and follow the herd. Perhaps a crisis like Covid-19 accentuates each motive.
Take sounding grand to start with. Consultants want to show that they know what they’re saying when advising companies to deal with a once-in-a-century pandemic that no living person has experienced. They could play it safe and advise clients to “do a few things at a time” but the CEO, who gets such advice from their grandmother, will baulk at paying big bucks to hear the same words from their consultant. So this is how one consultancy words the same advice: “Choose the journey carefully to start. It is too easy to try to boil the ocean.” Similarly, get your ducks in a row sounds grander than prepare properly and think outside the box than think creatively.
Covid-19 also forces managers into hiding ignorance. When the pandemic hit us none of us knew what was happening – and we remain befuddled today. So there’s plenty of ignorance to camouflage. And Donald Rumsfeld has taught us that the best way to say “We have no clue” is by employing the phrase “unknown unknowns”. A Forbes article starts with this balderdash in its headline itself: “Leadership after Covid-19: learning to navigate the unknown unknowns”. And continues in the same vein in the article, offering incoherent advice like, “Post-crisis leadership requires tuning in to other frequencies and applying behaviours that are not as narrowly focused and have less immediate goals.”
We know that people follow the herd. And managers, who strive to do everything better, follow the herd with more gusto. During Covid-19 no managerial jargon has become trendier than ‘new normal’. In 2020, the World Health Organisation titled a webpage as ‘The new normal’. And just a few days ago, on 10th February 2022, Forbes published an article on ‘Building effective remote teams in the new normal’. Meanwhile the Pew Research Centre issued a grim warning that “Experts say the ‘new normal’ in 2025 will be far more tech-driven,”. In our fast paced, fickle world, surely the new normal in 2021 would be an upgrade over the new normal in 2020 and the one in 2025 even more advanced? Maybe we should clear the confusion by using terms such as ‘newer normal’, ‘newest normal’ and ‘new normal 2.1’.
But managers don’t appear confused. Leaders in every industry – from agriculture to aeronautics, banking to building materials, and postal services to pharmaceuticals – are saying ‘new normal’ these days. Some of them are saying it several times a day.
The extend of corporate guff has been ridiculed often (like here and here). Despite this, managerial mumbo-jumbo has spread through organizations like an alarming virus. For example, in conference calls during Covid-19, hearing their CEO instructing them to take a discussion offline, employees start using the word at every opportunity, whether it’s warranted or not. For example, “To prepare for ACE (After-Covid Existence), I need to discuss key milestones with you offline. Or if you have time, we can discuss them offline now.”
New employees, listening to ear loads of such corporate blather from their managers – in the conference room, on the telephone, via email, and over drinks to celebrate the latest merger – begin speaking like that too.
As business leaders, we need to stop this nonsense. Let’s pivot from the jargon status quo and leverage normal language as a core competency. Whoops, sorry! I mean let’s stop using jargon and start speaking English.
If we don’t, jargon will become everyday parlance and employees will cease to understand us when we speak like ordinary humans. Soon you may face a situation like this.
You tell your manager to focus on only two things during the pandemic– e-commerce and delivery – because they are the “easiest to do and will produce quick results.”
They stare at you, puzzled. “But why?” they ask. “I don’t see the logic.”
Now you are puzzled. “I just told you why,” you reply. “Because they’re the easiest and will yield results soon.”
The manager’s face clears. “Oh, you mean I should go after the low-hanging fruit? Why didn’t you speak plainly in the first instance?
This article first appeared in The Strait Times, Singapore, on 27 Feb 2022
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